Being that 2012 is both a leap year and the commemorative year of that great mind of cryptoanalysis and algorithms, Alan Turing, it's time you get some head hovercraft of the abstract persuasion, Members. With such haberdashery, you'll spend less time being uselessly puzzled by straining to visualize problems that have no place in two or three dimensions, and more time just figuring it the fuck out. As such, your style will be exactly that of Richard Feynman, who, after explaining the conservation of energy using the example of a mother algebraically tracking the blocks of a wiley child, waxed that "the most remarkable aspect that must be abstracted from this picture is that there are no blocks." And like Kurt Godel - the Brainiac of any mathematical universe - you will not be bothered one scintilla in 2012 by the fact that no system can be both complete and consistent. The maths are in, Members and even though in 2012 your forehead finery won't solve any absolute truths, it will, in the best Ludwig Wittgenstein fashion, invent them.
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Consider your brain, members. Now imagine it's an industrial wall some where off the banks of the Cuyahoga River - there's a good chance it's seen better days, but really, it's a survivor. And consider this here new year, 2011. Now imagine said year is an anonymous grafitti artist that has just tagged you, enlived your urban sturdy survivalist self with something rather demanding and unusual, mutating your previously anonymous structure into a very distinct stated position. And so be it, and so what about it, members - your question and declaration for the next 365. The silence of brick and mortar won't fly this year, but your motor mouth sure will. Put a little lung behind it and enjoy mouthing off in the new year~
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Don't think big, Members. Don't think merely giant, (though giant is pretty hot, yes?). Don't think large, or XXL or venti for crying out loud. No, it's MMX and indeed this January 1st, it's time to step it up a galactic knotch or two. That means getting your concepts to expand like Jupiter's ribcage while he inhales all 11 string theory universes in order to exhale megafauna, godzilla, and ancient gladitorial structures writhing with Romans and roaring almighty - that's the mission for your mind over the next 365 days. Because it don't matter if this here orbit gets the thumbs up or the thumbs down - 2010 is the year It's Colossal!

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Here's thing about analog members, and about the new year: 1) Analog is a signal that is continuous in time and amplitude, so it's sustained; 2) Analog media, at optimum performance, has high fidelity to whatever noise it's trying to put out there and 3) Analog is old school. To help you in your coming analog pursuits are the patron saints of the new year, two of the most analog inventors that ever lived: Wilbur & Orville Wright. At Kitty Hawk, they defied gravity with some spruce wood, a bicycle shop engine, and some funny ideas about controlling row, pitch & yaw - and not a single microchip to be found. So in this, the last year of the oughts for a very long time, members are commanded to put it out there in sustained, hi-fi, old school style. And if anyone along the way charges you with being retrograde, tell them firmly: "I am an enthusiast, not a crank!

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We all got angles, members. And there's a whole mathematical science dedicated to working 'em. As members, 2008 will offer an opportunity to employ and enjoy the 4000 year old secret of unit circle wizardry: that even if all knowns may not be accounted for in their entirety, it's possible to predict the truth of a thing. The trick is to remember you got functions, expressions equal parts independent and dependent, which can identify the ratios, recipricols, and inverses of 2008 with the the exactitude of a mathematician's eye. Consider calculations like sine, cosine, tangent, cosecant, secant, cotangent, arcsine, arccosine, and arctangent, oddly named geniuses at your service. Orson Welles once said that the enemy of art is the absence of limitations. And whether by formula, graph, or algorithm, in 2008 your art is to work those limitations with the elegance of a Lissajous Curve, the frequency of the Pythagorean Identity, and the infiniteness of Euler's Product.

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2007 Is the year to Take it to the Bridge. What you do when you get there is entirely up to you: a) barrel into town; b) get the hell out of Dodge; c) jump into the drink; d) burn that thing down; e) bring it back to the chorus.

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2006! Whatever your gravity, 7 miles a second ain't nothin'!
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2005 is the year no one notices that hamster on your head,
ergo, giving you license to ignore it yourself.
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2004: we all have talents.
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...The whole point of the doomsday device is lost if you keep it a secret
...why didn't you tell the world, eh?
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Whether you're dishing in out or taking it, 2002 was a year for haymakers.
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What better way to begin the millenium than with three arms?
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Divine and Shakespeare, matter and anti-matter, everybody was getting in bed with weirdos in 1999.
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Balls out with Bette! 1998 was the year to let your female macho take control.
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The funny thing about 1997 is that gettin' right can sometimes be a pain in the ass.
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1996 was the year to embrace all that is candyass within ourselves.
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The Chairman had a thing or two to teach us about doing it our way in 1995.
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